20 Desember 2009

my life going upside down

dear blog, lagi2 hari ini aku mencurahkan segala keluh kesahku kepadamu....

akhir2 ini hidup terasa di jungkir balikan, semua kemudahan yang dulu kudapatkan sekarang semakin sulit untuk dijangkau, semua impian yang kupupuk dan kutanamkan menjadi semakin kabur. apakah ini rasanya menjadi orang dewasa, menjadi orang yang bertanggung jawab atas diriku sendiri.

masalah datang silih berganti, dari papa yang terkena stroke, pekerjaan dan jatuh cinta dengan seseorang yang telah memiliki pasangan. semua rasa ter-aduk2 dalam satu waktu. rasa takut, sedih, cemburu, kangen dan ketidakberdayaan bercampur menjadi satu. bersatu padu menjadi suatu hal yang membuat hati dan pikiran terkoyak-koyak menjadi tak beraturan. ingin aku rasanya lari dari semua masalah ini. masalah yang menggerogoti jiwaku, tapi apa daya hal itu tidak bisa kulakukan.

mungkin aku hanya harus lebih ikhlas menghadapi semua masalah itu dan berusaha menyatukan jiwa dan raga yang telah terkoyak. kita jalani saja, kita pecahkan satu per-satu. ini mungkin teguran tuhan untukku yang telah lalai, yang berdosa. dan mungkin ini adalah saatnya bagiku untuk mulai bermimpi kembali, mulai berpikir apa yang ingin aku capai dan mulai mencari apa tujuan hidupku.

mari kita mulai semuanya dari awal kembali, dari 0, dari titik nadir. mari kita kumpulkan semangat dan keberanian kembali. masalah ini harus dihadapi, bukan untuk dihindari. dengan bismillah kita mulai semuanya kembali.


12 November 2009

Feeling lost....

kenapa ya akhir-akhir aku merasa agak aneh, merasa terkucilkan, merasa kalah.

apa karena kontrak kerja ku yang akan berakhir, atau karena hal yang lain.......
atau apa karena kesombonganku yang memporak-porandakan relung2 kehidupanku......

aku pun tidak tahu.

aku tidak tahu kemana lagi aku harus melangkah, kemana lagi aku harus memulai.
aku bertanya-tanya sebetulnya apa tujuan ku bekerja????
bidang apa yang harus ku ambil.
adakah ada karir di bidang pekerjaan ku yang kujalani sekarang ini.

well i don't know....
now all i can do just try every single step to another point of my life.
just try finding out, how it feel to be an adult, to be responsible for yourself and community.
and learn how to be yourself.

so.... dear Lord, please give me your light to let me follow the right path of my life and give me your kindness to feel the emptiness in my heart.

and dear Lord thank you for everything.

13 Oktober 2009

Hmmm a very nice article......

Good Reasons to Recycle

1 - It takes 75,000 trees each week to produce the Sunday edition of the New York Times.

2 - If Americans recycled just one-tenth of their newspapers, we would save 25 million trees a year.

3 - Recycling and reusing the material in "tin" cans reduces energy use by 74%, air pollution by 85%, solid waste by 95%, and water pollution by 76%.

4 - It takes 95% less energy to make aluminum by recycling it than by producing it from its natural ore, bauxite. It costs less too.

5 - The average American uses 580 pounds of paper each year. As a nation we consume 850 million trees annually.

6 - In 1991, the Great Wall of China became the second largest man-made structure in the world. The largest was Fresh Kills Landfill, serving New York City. It is now the highest point on the east coast.

7 - Americans throw away 2.5 million plastic bottles every hour!

8 - FOR EVERY GLASS BOTTLE RECYCLED, WE SAVE ENOUGH ENERGY TO LIGHT A 100 WATT LIGHT BULB FOR 4 HOURS.

9 - Every year, Americans throw away enough office and writing paper to build a wall 12 feet high from New York to Los Angeles.

10 - In one year, American steel recycling saves enough energy to heat and light 18 million homes. One pound of steel saves enough energy to light a 60 watt bulb for 24 hours.

Tips for Recycling

  1. Precycling is the step before recycling. This is the process of making a conscious choice to purchase or use products and services which will have a less harmful effect on the Environment.
  2. Know what is recycled in your community. Some items may have special collections and recycling locations (oil & antifreeze at gas stations; plastic bags at grocery stores; six-pack rings and house batteries at schools; grass and leaves at garden centers; etc....). If the product is packaged in material that is NOT recycled in your community, it becomes GARBAGE and is wasted!
  3. Buy products that use less packaging. Product packaging accounts for about 33% of all household garbage. If we refuse to buy products that are overpackaged, the manufacturers will by force to change their packaging to be more environmentally responsive.
  4. Close the loop " Buy Recycled". Choose to buy products that are made from recycled material. Its only recycling if you buy recycled products.
  5. Buy recyclable products. Choose products that are made of or packaged in recyclable material. Paper bags, cardboard boxes, glass bottles, aluminum and tin cans, and some plastics are easily recycled.
  6. Avoid reliance on the word "degradable". A degrade product must be exposed to the element to breakdown. In a land fill these items do not breakdown because they are protected by tons of debris and dirt.
  7. Avoid disposable and one-time use products. These are a waste of resources and energy to produce. In most cases their are reusable alternatives.
  8. Buy in bulk or concentrated forms when ever possible. This usually saves money and reduces the amount of waste that is thrown away.
  9. Reuse items. Try to reuse items as many times as possible. If you do not have a use for items that are still good or operational, donate them to a local charity or environmental organization. Ask to see their wish list, you may have something they need. Many items can also be used for other things than what they were first purchase for. Be creative!
    A plastic bottle can be made into a/ Funnel by cutting off the bottom. Liner for a planter or flower pot.Bird feeder. Container for storing nails, screws, washers and nuts. Etc...
  10. If you are not happy about the packaging you see, speak up. Let manufactures and store managers know that you are not happy with the way a product is packaged.

Producing 1 ton of paper from recycled pulp saves 17 trees, 3 cubic yards of landfill space, and 7000 gallons of water. It also reduces air pollutants by 60 pounds, saves 390 gallons of oil, and conserves 4200 kilowatt hours of energy -- enough to heat a home for half a year. Estimates show that 9 jobs are created for every 15,000 tons of solid waste recycled into new products.

Recycling reduces our reliance on landfills and incinerators.
Recycling protects our health and environment when harmful substances are removed from the waste stream.
Recycling conserves our natural resources because it reduces the need for raw materials.

Business Guide to Buying Recycled Products

Recycling is more than just placing certain materials in a special bin. The recycling loop is complete only when materials that you have separated for recycling are processed and remanufactured into new products, which are then sold. Recycling works only when consumers, businesses and organizations buy products made with recycled material.

Advances in manufacturing technology have enabled most recycled products to compete - both in price and quality - with products made from virgin materials.

Always look at the level of post-consumer recycled content in a product: this is the material that has been collected from consumers and reprocessed. Manufacturers often include pre-consumer material in their total recycled content calculation: this material includes manufacturing scraps, and other by-products that were never used in the consumer market.

Reduce, Reuse & Recycle!

source: http://www.ecomall.com/biz/recycle1.htm

09 September 2009

huh ada apa dengan diriku........

huh ada apa dengan diriku......

aku kini semakin tidak mempunyai tujuan.
aku semakin meninggalkan mu ya Tuhanku.
aku semakin tenggelam dalam rutinitas dan kesepian.

aku merasa tidak tahu apalagi yang harus kuraih.
apa lagi yang harus kugapai.
aku merindukan seseorang yang bisa memberikanku belaian, seseorang yang bisa memberikanku ketenagan dan pengertian.
seseorang untuk ku berbagi dan kulindungi.

oh Tuhan dimanakah aku bisa menemukan seseorang itu.
oh Tuhan aku takut, jika aku menemukan seseorang tersebut, aku akan melanggar laranganmu.
oh Tuhan aku takut, takut menjadi kaum yang kamu benci dan kamu laknati.
oh Tuhan aku takut, takut membuat sedih kedua orang tuaku dan saudaraku.

walaupun aku sadar kalo ini adalah kehidupanku.
tapi aku juga sadar kalo aku hidup tidak sendirian.
oh Tuhan berikanlah aku kekuatan dan petunjukmu untuk menjalani hidup ini, agar aku bisa menjadi mahlukMu yang berbudi dan berguna.

dari aku hambaMu, manusia yang tak berdaya dan berlumur dengan dosa.

28 Agustus 2009

What if....

what if
what if
and what if

it is a question that always bugging my mind.....
what if going to happen if doing this and that.....

what if one ignoring me
or what if one hate me

why i can't just say it all
why i don't have the bravery to say it all

sometimes it feels sucks if you got to much question in your head

so what's your next step...

just quiet or start to make a move.

20 Agustus 2009

dude please get real.......

well it's something that i need to say to myself......

dudes please get real. please just realize that you can't get him.....
dudes please just forget him......
please just forget him.....

you might think that he is people like us. but i think he's not.
he's got someone on his back. he's already get married.
please don't ruin the others family, please just ignored him.

you might feel sick, but that will make you thankful to me. the other side of you.

come on someday you'll find someone to love you, to take care of, but i am sure it is not him.

18 Agustus 2009

Sepi.....

wahai sepi sampai kapan kah engkau akan menemani ku.
wahai sepi ada apakah gerangan sampai engkau tidak mau meninggalkan aku.
wahai gundah kenapa engkau selalu hadir dalam perasaan ku.
wahai cinta kapankah engkau akan datang menemani ku.



tapi walaupun sepi dan gundah aku akan terus mencoba untuk terus bertahan.
meskipun aku akan terus seperti ini sepanjang zaman.
aku akan terus bertahan.
untuk manggapai cinta dan impian yang kuinginkan.